Men, this is for you.

Are women really THAT complex?

Men, do you sometimes feel like you couldn’t decipher our indirect language and dramatic behaviour at times?

Probably most of my male readers would do a slow repetitive nod for this very common question about gender differences so I decided to write something that (hopefully) could enlighten you on how to deal with the enigmatic behaviour of women especially in terms of our hobby of starting a quarrel.

This, however, will focus on one thing. No big deal—only one single revelation that I urge you to please embrace with all your being, just in case you would find this fascinating.

There is no secret formula to crack the code inside a woman’s brain, you would only be needing an open mind and a heart that’s full of patience. Again, patience.

Have you ever witnessed your wife or girlfriend who all of a sudden got angry and when you asked her what’s wrong, she answered you with an enraged I-don’t-know?

If you’re sometimes lucky, we also get mad for a reason—but most of them are merely minor and petty.

It’s undeniably true that we also say no, when it really means yes. That today we love you but then a few minutes later, we hate you.

That’s when you would give us that strange look and we would get into your nerves and you would scratch your head and probably get angry in return for the mystery of our emotional roller coaster.

Men, listen.

This is the real reason behind this unknown source of dismay:

PMS.

Lol, i know. I bet this is not like a new word for you but heyyy there’s something you need to know more about this, because Google would only define PMS as boring as this:

Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) is a combination of symptoms that many women get about a week or two before their period. Most women, over 90%, say they get some premenstrual symptoms, such as bloating, headaches, and moodiness.

This is yes, correct, but did you know that the symptoms, most especially moodiness, doesn’t only happen a week or two before our monthly visit? The fact of the matter is, it happens to our well being with no time frame, with irregular schedules, and no whatsoever reminder that we’re already PMSing. Even the “P” that stands for “pre”, also stands for “post” at times. We find this annoying too, just as much as you do, because there are times we find ourselves in deep loneliness (sometimes crying) over something uncertain. This is weird, we know that, but you have to understand that it ain’t easy. To be a woman of moodswings, that is.

So men, forgive us, if we shouted at you and started a fight you with little to no valid reason. We don’t really want to, but the abrupt changes in our body on a monthly basis is really devastating thus making our hormones go wild that creates some sort of an imbalance. This triggers the rage and the fury as our emotions go crazy. We don’t usually admit these things to you, out of fear of sounding weak, or just because we think you won’t understand. But seriously though, we got this. We’ve taken it all in and accepted this as a part of us, being ruled mostly by our Amygdala, with little control of it.

Acceptance is the key to simplify our complexity. As contradicting as it may seem, but if you really want to understand a woman’s brain, you have to be extra patient with us and in return, we’ll be all-out with you in terms of love.

Women will never stop PMSing, even until we reach the inexorable stage of menopausing. We are created to be an epitome of ambivalence, with a mind full of emotional fluctuations like the stock market. But nevertheless, we’re not using this as an excuse to have the license to start a fight from nothing but pure moodswinging, but for you to have a broad understanding of this flaw and to make you realize that despite this inevitable situation, we can rather compensate through our sweet gestures and sincere expression of tender love and care. 😉

Ps. Survival tip: When we’re going crazy, a kiss on the forehead and a tight hug is all we need to stay calm. No words—just these sweet gestures will be enough to make us feel safe.

Sheer suffering

The ache deepens as I was having a tour of our old photos again,

I could hardly breathe, my heart seemed like being punched by a giant’s fist.

I shed tears as I cogitate the why’s of your unforeseen evanescence.

How could we end up as terrible as this?

How could you just let go of the dreams we vowed to achieve?

You left me hanging like a cat of multiple lives who was born again after a cataclysmic death—in this new life, there’s but no more of you.

Tell me, is there something I should have done to prolong the pages of our story?

(Photo credit to the owner)

How can I make a masterpiece?

You were supposed to write something.

But you couldn’t fathom why your mind is overflowing

With too much lists and codes, too much worries—it’s disgusting.

So you end up staring at your laptop,

fingertips ready to dance with the keypad,

eyes glued to the screen, chair’s heating up for real.

You’ve been planning to write something,

but no swift thought can satisfy your brain’s craving—for something original, something unclichéd that could mean a thing.

Then you turn to a book you were reading, hoping for the light bulb to say, ting!

Unfortunately there’s still nothing.

Is this a mere writer’s block or but pure folly?

Nonetheless, you really want to write something,

so you thrust your whole being to ponder thoroughly, to dig for ideas tremendously

But your disoriented mind is not helping.

It’s when your heart start pounding, that you realize what’s missing.

You forgot to listen to your heart, as your mind overrule you with boring facts and schemes.

It was saying something.

What did it say?

Your heart says it’s in pain.

You then grabbed this time your pen and paper,

jotting down each word your heart dictates.

You didn’t mind if it’s basic and plain, if it lacks pompous adjectives or peculiar adverbs

All you care is what your heart is telling you to create.

You didn’t mind how the readers would react.

It’s merely for the purpose of bursting them feelings out.

You then finish the piece out of sheer signals from the heart.

Making you discern it’s not hard after all, it only takes a heart that speaks to make a such masterpiece.

(Photo credit to owner)

A flawless you

arvypainting

He looked at me twice like oh-em-gee I didn’t see that coming.

The nonchalant glance saying…

I see you staring at me all the time,

saying…

I know what’s running on your mind,

saying…

I know you have a crush on me, so don’t hide.

This is what I like about him—he’s the silent type,

the shy but looking-like-a-genius kind.

He’s a little snob, heedless of my presence sometimes

But I find it sexy so I don’t really mind

He’s like the most gorgeous unpredictable guy I’ve seen ever.

Oh dear, can I just own you forever?

I tried to look away but my eyes keep coming back to him.

Maybe they merely enjoy the scene—them chinese eyes and thick brows, his perfect hair and tiny nose, and his subtle cheeks…

I’ve been wanting to smell and kiss.

Tell me how not to fall for you?

When all i see now is a flawless you.

 

(Special thanks again to my partner in life, Arvy for his original digital painting above.)

 

 

How are you?

You’re not okay.

Yet you kept on fooling yourself that you are.

You fake that smile without knowing your eyes show nothing but pure sorrow.

You’re in denial of it, because you don’t want people to know you’re in the brink of falling.

You post that selfie in social media to let your followers know that you’re okay.

But little did they know that behind that filter, your naked face apparently shows that you’re on the process of healing.

It’s not even a scar yet.

It’s a fresh wound, it’s still bleeding.

Due to that heartbreak,

due to that love that’s unrequited,

due to the dream that seems so far away,

due to that person who caused you pain,

due to the quarter life or mid life crisis you’re experiencing,

due to being unhappy with your job,

due to not knowing what you want,

due to the envy you feel towards others,

due to the depression you’re going through right now

It’s torturing you but when someone asked you a how-are-you, you always answer them with the I’m-okay lie.

You’re not okay and you even thought about leaving the town or your country and start anew elsewhere.

Didn’t you?

But you didn’t know where to start and you don’t even have the courage to commence a plan of escape.

To escape from reality, from the inevitable adult problems that is so hard to get rif off.

But hey, listen to me.

Why don’t you acknowledge the fact that you’re depressed about something?

Embrace the fact that your skin is wounded upto the deepest layer of your soul.

You are bound to get hurt—whether you like it or not.

Feel it with every nerve you’ve got so you get to know better the kind of pain you’re going through.

Once you find the root of it, pull it out like weeds that need to get cut off, so it won’t fester in other parts of you.

Because you are beautiful and a one single cause of being not okay should never define you.

This time, I hope you learn how to confide in your best friend or whoever it is that you fully trust, be vulnerable with them and share them your inner thoughts, tell them the truth that you’re not okay.

Go to your room or to church or to your favorite place and cry it out loud, release all the tears your eyes are capable of bursting.

Or better yet, write it down. Everything.

You will see a massive change in you once you start being honest with yourself.

Remember, it’s okay to not be okay as long as you’re not in denial of it so you can find a solution for it.

You’re not okay today, but I promise you, as clichéd as it may seem, this too shall pass.

(Photo credit to Pinterest)

I wonder

I write about you ’cause I wonder,

if I take the chance, are we gonna end up together?

Aware of the image of another,

You told me you don’t care ’cause you’re a believer—

Of two souls who dance perfectly well with the tune of each heartbeat

Of like-minded people who are bound to meet

Of two hearts that ignite when the stars blink

Blessed by the sky and the moon and the heavens

I wonder, can we really make this happen?

(Photo credit to the owner)